Dear Family,
Another transfer has flown by, and I can't believe it. This next
transfer I'll be staying here in Brussels and training a blue(new
missionary)! And Sister Judd will be hopping next door, to Liege. We
find out about transfers on Saturdays, but Friday night if you're
training you get a call from the AP's. This last friday we were on the
bus headed out to have dinner with a member family when the phone rang
and I saw the AP's number and my stomach just dropped. But the mission
seems to be all about being presented with obstacles you never thought
you could hurdle and then letting the Lord help you get over them. So I
guess this transfer will just be another one of those :)
How are you all doing? How's Provo? Is it nice and hot over there?
I've been loving the weather over here, it's pretty cold and windy and
rainy all the time, the other day I almost got my winter coat out again.
It's a lot better for missionary work than when it's hot though, so I
say thanks about a hundred times a day. I'm absolutely in love with
Belgium, I'd come live here again after the mission in a heartbeat. I
hope I get a chance to. You know what else I love? Other people. They're
so fun to talk to, it's like getting the chance to live multiple lives,
to get another view on life that is totally different from your own.
Since last wednesday I fixed a goal to read the whole Book of
Mormon again before the transfer ended, and I just finished up the book
of Ether. I love reading the Book of Mormon in one go like that, you get
to see the whole big picture and it all just blows me away. The Lord is
so merciful to His children. There are a thousand references in that
book that confirm that as soon as we repent and keep his
commandments, He showers down blessings upon us. And the missionaries
throughout the Book of Mormon are incredible, it makes me realize that I
really am not applying my faith as I should... If thousands aren't
being baptized, something is terribly wrong! Haha. And I was especially
struck by Ether chapter 4 today, how many great things the Lord showed
unto the brother of Jared because of his faith and how because God is no
respecter of persons, each of us can be afforded that privilege if we
live worthy of it. I love the Book of Mormon with all my heart. I know
that it is true. I know that more than just about anything else.
This transfer has been the hardest of my mission. I struggled more
than I should have. There were some waterworks. But I also prayed more
than I ever have in my life and the Lord visited me many many times in
His love. One moment that sticks out from the transfer was when we were
teaching John and he made a comment (I don't remember exactly
what) about how we believe in Jesus Christ and work for him. And I was
pierced to my heart by the thought, 'I believe in Jesus Christ. I know
he lives. I love him' and I wish I could better describe the feeling.
Serving a mission has given me the opportunity to ask if I myself if
really do believe that Jesus Christ will come one day, and if all this
will be worth it. And I know he will. And I know it will. Nothing
gives me more comfort than the thought of someday seeing him, and the
prints of the nails in His hands, and knowing that I have served him
faithfully. I pray that I can be worthy of that moment when that day
comes.
I feel the way Moroni does in Ether 12, when he worries about His
weakness in writing. I wish I could properly express my testimony. But I
suppose simplicity is best. "Complication comes from Satan" as my
district leader would say :) And I've been learning a lot about how the
Lord really does use small and simple things to bring great things
about.
This week we taught a woman named Nini. She has had a very
difficult life, and we talked about the plan of salvation and when we
talked about the celestial kingdom she pointed to it and said, 'I'm
going there, the Lord owes me. He knows what he's done to me. He had
better send me there.' Afterwards I thought about how each of us is
going to feel very very small in front of the Lord when he one day shows
us everything he has done for us, despite our wishy washy-ness and
sometimes outright rebellion. But the thing that most struck me, and the
thing we were able to testify to her about, is that life really is very
difficult for us. But it is BECAUSE of those difficulties that the Lord
gave us the gospel and the Church. He knew that if we didn't go to
church every sunday, we would get caught up in the rush of the world and
never have a break and just get sucked under. He knew that if we didn't
have the chance to serve others we would only think about ourselves and
we would be miserable. Too often I think we (or at least, I) go
through our list of commandments we've kept and say, "see, Lord? See all
the things I'm doing for you? I better get paid back for all of this
someday." When really they were given for us. He can stand us in front
of the mirror and show us who we have become and how happy we are thanks
to everything he taught us to do. When we live the commandments we are
truly free--from guilt, from the world, from cares about money. Keeping
the sabbath day holy is a big issue we have run into with people. And
I've noticed that the result is always the feeling that there is
never enough time, never enough money, people are running through life
like hamsters on wheels. What the Lord offers us is a break, with the
promise that he will then help us do everything else. I like what Sister
Judd says, "People who don't have time to read their scriptures or go
to church are far busier than the Lord ever meant them to be".
God lives, and He is infinitely kind and giving to His children. I
have a testimony of that. I feel often like an inadequate servant,
especially at these moments when I'm writing to all of you about it and I
wish I had fantastic stories to share. I do have quite a few stories,
I'll talk all your ears off when I get back :) But I do have my
testimony.
I love the people here, every last crazy one of them. This has been
a fun week to see how much people care, since we've been doing the
rounds and exchanging goodbyes with Sr. Judd. My heart could just burst.
I love the language, I love Belgium, I love the whole chance to see
myself doing what I never would have thought I was capable of. I love
all of you, my admiration grows every day for those of you who have
already served missions or who are parents, and I'm so excited for all
of you who have yet to serve missions, because you're going to be
amazing. You'll knock their socks off. If I can do it, anyone can.
Seriously.
Well, signing off again. This'll be an exciting week, be excited for the next email! Woot!
Love you all, mucho. Bueno.
Your favorite crazy strange sister missionary,
Soeur Larsen
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